Listening in the Dark
Because I’m spending much time “listening in the dark,” I’m unable to acknowledge all your individual email messages. I’m, therefore, using this means to say thank you to all of you for your prayers and words of encouragement & support. It is also my way of answering some of your questions about how I’m doing spiritually and what I intend to do in the future.
During the past months, I’ve been spending considerable amount of time doing spiritual inventory of my life—taking stock of what happened and why, rebuilding my spiritual walls, and strengthening the bonds with my family. My wife and I have also spent some time alone on a long-overdue vacation/retreat. Spending time alone with her was extremely valuable, as we did a lot of walking in nature, reading, and recounting God's manifold blessings and mercies. The quiet time has also given us ample opportunity to engage in intercessory prayer for our friends, family, young people, and colleagues in ministry. Additionally, I’ve been jotting down important spiritual lessons from my experience which I hope to share with you in the near future. These varied activities have greatly speeded up the healing process.
I want to assure you all that, by the grace of God, I’m doing very well spiritually. After my strength is fully renewed, I will continue the work in any line of our Lord’s own choosing and timing. I see my failure as a stumble, not a fall. The Lord always restores His genuinely repentant children. It is for this reason that I seek to do the right thing, even in how I handle the failure. This is another reason why I submitted to church discipline (to see my reasons for requesting it, click Here). I believe that this decision was also the biblical thing to do. And judging from the positive responses I'm receiving from godly people around the world, it is evident that my tragic experience is opening up subjects (such as spiritual failure, repentance, forgiveness, discipline, consequences, etc.) which we're often afraid, ashamed, or unwilling to tackle in our personal lives. If, however, we follow the Lord's inspired counsels, we can rest in His promise through King David:
The steps of a good man are ordered by the LORD,
And He delights in his way.
Though he fall, he shall not be utterly cast down;
For the LORD upholds him with His hand.
I have been young, and now am old;
Yet I have not seen the righteous forsaken,
Nor his descendants begging bread
(Psalm 37:23-25; emphasis mine)
As far as plans for my future are concerned, they are still in God's hands. But I'm confident that the Lord will find me a place where I can continue to honor my call to ministry--whether or not it is in full-time denominational employment. I will let you know when things become very clear. For now, my highest priority is simply to wait patiently on the Lord and let Him do His inner work on my heart. These moments of waiting and "listening in the dark" are valuable for all of us. For, those whom the Lord uses, He first strips of every ounce of self. And often, the Lord gives us the best training in the silence of darkness. In the words of E. G. White, that's the time a caged bird learns how to sing:
“In the full light of day, and in hearing of the music of other voices, the caged bird will not sing the song that his master seeks to teach him. He learns a snatch of this, a trill of that, but never a separate and entire melody. But the master covers the cage, and places it where the bird will listen to the one song he is to sing. In the dark, he tries and tries again to sing that song until it is learned, and he breaks forth in perfect melody. Then the bird is brought forth, and ever after he can sing that song in the light. Thus God deals with His children. He has a song to teach us, and when we have learned it amid the shadows of affliction we can sing it ever afterward” (Ministry of Healing, 472).
Oswald Chamber's My Utmost for His Highest says pretty much the same thing:
"At times God puts us through the discipline of darkness to teach us to heed Him. Songbirds are taught to sing in the dark, and we are put into the shadow of God's hand until we learn to hear Him. 'What I tell you in darkness,'--watch where God puts you into darkness, and when you are there keep your mouth shut. Are you in the dark just now in your circumstances, or in your life with God? Then remain quiet. If you open your mouth in the dark, you will talk in the wrong mood: darkness is the time to listen. Don't talk to other people about it; don't read books to find out the reason of the darkness, but listen and heed. If you talk to other people, you cannot hear what God is saying. When you are in the dark, listen, and God will give you a very precious message for someone else when you get into the light."
Thus, while my faith in the Lord continues to be renewed day by day, I’m also learning to sing in the dark. My tragedy has been a very painful experience. But the Lord is transforming the pain for my good. When He finishes His work in my life, I'm sure I'll be much more equipped (perhaps much more than ever before) to continue His work in any line of His choosing.
Again, I want you all to know that I truly appreciate your prayers and words of encouragement. Many of you are also in my prayers and thoughts. Remember that whatever happens to you in your own personal lives, the Lord is still in control. Therefore, keep listening in the dark. That's the time the best music is learned. It will be well.
Regards,
Your Brother,
skp
Samuel Koranteng-Pipim, PhD
